I am way too tired to write very much today. I got up early. I didn't want to, but I got up, got dressed - my mom gave me an apple strudel and then half of hers for breakfast. I also took my morning meds, got my coffee and headed out the door. I'm glad I didn't miss class because the first class was WRAP (wellness Recovery Action Planning). We talked about how to respond to triggers and we made lists of what we could do - like write in journal, meditate, deep breathing . . .
Second class was Process Group or a fancy way of saying Group Therapy. I wasn't sure I was going to share, but I decided to share about Cassie. I just felt down a little and I talked about how I let Cassie stay with her godparents and that she has her own room now and I guess I wish I could have been the one to give that to her. But they told me several times over that I was a good mom because I wanted what was best for my daughter. I know that's the case, but I guess I can't hear it enough.
After that, I came home. Ate a chicken sandwich, put on Fox News and crashed out. I slept for awhile until I had to get up and take my mom to pick up her medication. She was completely out so it was totally necessary. Then we came back. I got online and puttered around until dinner - which was chicken sandwiches, salad, asparagas and strawberries. Now I've written an email to my Aussie. I've written here and now I'm ready to take night meds and maybe go to sleep earlier than usual. It might help me for tomorrow. I definitely need more sleep.
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