Had a Good Productive Day!

Well, my day started early. I only got about 3 or mayber 4 hours of sleep last night. I think I was just too wound up to sleep. I knew I had to wake up early to get the brakes taken care of.

It was hard waking up. I downed a 5-hour energy AND I fixed my coffee before I left. When I got the car there, I was glad. I think I was there for at least three hours. I read for a good portion of it. "State of Fear" is getting really good!! But I also watched one of the Navy Aircraft Carriers come into port after being gone for 6 months. I can't remember the name if the ship though, which sucks. But it was awesome to watch the families waiting and to see the soldiers finally leave the ship. See the first hugs and first kisses . . . Awesome! It also turned out that it wasn't the front brakes I needed to take care of, but the rear brakes! :-P At least it was the same price. I walked out of there having spent only $112! Cool, huh?

After that, I was starving so I stopped at Sombrero's where I got a Chili Relleno Burrito. It wasn't as good as Cotija's. Plus they put sauce all over it and I didn't taste any sour cream in it. That sucks. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't what I wanted. I just didn't want to drive down to Santee. I suppose next time I'll have to.

When I got home Jordan wanted to go out and get a couple of burgers. I needed to put fuel in the car so we headed out again. We went to the gas station and I almost forgot what side of the car my gas tank was on. No, I'm not tired at all! :-P But we got fuel and it was a great price. I think it was $3.77 per gallon. Or something close to that. Then we swung around to McDonald's. I got him a couple of McDoubles and I got myself a Diet Dr. Pepper. After that, we headed over to Kahoots to get crickets and fish. While I was there, I asked if they'd take a red-eared slider if I brought one in. When I told her it was the size of my hand, she said it was big enough to sell. I also asked what Crayfish eat . . . well, it turns out they eat goldfish!!! :-P So basically I'm buying fish now, for the crayfish that Cassie named Mr. Crabs. I have to keep him! Anyway, we went home long enough to have Jordan dump the water out of the little tank for the turtle and then brought the turtle back to Kahoots. As soon as he was in the tank with the other turtles he was digging it! That was just awesome to watch. I know he's much happier. And as it turns out, it is a HE!! Not a She! I was pretty happy getting that done, knowing that Waterclaw was going to be much happier!

Coming home, I played on Cafemom for awhile and then I took off to go to therapy. My therapist is moving offices and will be at the new office by the time of my next appointment. What's cool, is the place is closer to me! Yay! But I had a good session. Talked about Cassie. Talked about the kids in general. Talked about my dad and how depressed I was on the 13th, but how I feel better now. AND I told him about finally dropping Greg. EVERYONE has told me to dump him and this isn't the first time. Dr. Tess felt it was definitely a significant event. I think it was time. It needed to be time.

When I got home I heated up some spaghetti. I watched news about Tot Mom - Casey whatever her last name is. I HATE her. I think she's a lying, murderous BITCH. She should have killed herself. And since she didn't, I hope the state does! My mom also made some lemon meringe pies - little ones. They were so good! I would have liked it a tad bit sweeter, but it's still delicious. And after that I went back to Cafemom and watching about Tot Mom. Even now, I finished watching "Haunted Collector" and I think I'm going to check back in with Cafemom, but then I'm going to shut things down, do some reading and go to sleep a little earlier than I have been.        

Negatives and Positives

I have a feeling this is going to be a very short since I don't really have much to say. My day was pretty minimal as far as what I was able to do because I slept most of the day. I was tired. I basically took too much medicine last night trying to get to sleep. I did wake up at 8:30am and called Greg because I didn't want to go down there without knowing he was awake. Well, I called and called and surprise, surprise, I didn't hear from him. In fact, I haven't heard from him AT ALL! Of course, the asshole has to do that to me. If he doesn't get off his ass and fix my car like he said he would then I won't talk to him ever again. I have never been able to rely on him and it's basically the same shit, different day. He hasn't changed at all. He still blows me off. I don't care what his excuse is since it's probably Linda. I am done. I am doone with his lies. I am done with getting blown off and being told that he'll do something or will be there for me only to have him blow me off. I am so tired of him. I really am. And because of him, I'm fucked about getting brakes unless I can find someone to do it around $100 or if someone will front me the money for some of it until next month. I can't tell my mom. But this will be the last time I will let him let me down.

Anyway, I took way too much meds last night and after calling and waiting for a bit of trying to reach him I ended falling back to speed. I slept until 1:00pm, got up, ate some lunch - chicken fried steak with mashed potatoes and green beans. It was good. Then I went back to my room and I played online, but I don't think I stayed up all that long. I feel back asleep until around 6:00pm. Well slept on and off. I finally got up after that. My mom made some noodles and shrimp. I also had some tomatoes and canteloupe. I love melon. Yum!

Since then I watched some TV, but nothing really solid from beginning to end. I watched some "Criminal Minds" and "Law and Order: Criminal Intent" but I did watch "Sanctuary" all the way through. This one was kind of sad. They ended up in a Time Dialation dome. There were people living in there and their time was faster than normal time. The sad thing is, that by collapsing the dome, people born within the doom disappeared. Like they had never lived. It was too sad. I like happy endings and this one was just sad. :-( Hope the next one has a better ending.

Oh and Kimberly called me tonight and that helped put me in a little better mood. I really enjoy talking with her. We can inspire each other and be supportive. I think I need that at the time. I was telling her how I get a little down after I say goodbye to Cassie and she mentioned that I should trying to think of the positive. That I'm doing what's best. That I am a good mom. She did get me to think about what I truly believe about myself and it turns out that I am a LOYAL friend. I believe I am a loyal friend. She said to build on that, so I will try to do that. In fact, maybe I'll tell myself I'm beautiful and I love myself as I look at my reflection in the mirror.

Anyway, I suppse that's about it. Tomorrow is another day and I think it will be a good day. I need to get back to my positive attitude. I need to wake up and just start being positive again. Not that I'm really supper down or anything. But I want to be happy and positive. And every day is a new beginning. I have to remember that.

      

Tired Today - But Hanging in There

I know I missed last night writing in my journal here, but I was asleep. I was so tired and I'm still tired. I slept a lot yesterday. I think I fell asleep around 2:00pm and I basically slept until noon today. And here's whatelse is sad. I'm STILL tired. I've been dragging all day. Go figure.

I haven't done too much today really. I have just been on the computer most of the day - Cafemom is fun again. I am trying to keep just to the handful of groups I have - Cat Lovers. Bipolar Diaries. Poetry Emotion. Recipes and Moms Without Their Children - which is my group. I also started writing my GRAPES on the Journal there. Just something else for me to do.

My mom need to go take some letters to the post office. Important bills that she didn't want to leave it in the box for the letter carrier to take. After that, we went to Wendy's. I hadn't really eaten anything that I was starving when I got there. I had a number one - 1/4 lb. Cheeseburger, medium fries and a medium Dr. Pepper. My mom got the same thing except she got a light lemonade. I must have eaten that burger in record time! LOL! At least I felt like I had sucked it down. LOL! I was nice and brought home 3 double-stackers and a large fries for Jordan. 

After that, I was back on the computer. I did also watch "My Cat From Hell" though it wasn't a new one. It was Bear and the other was Lulu and Sully. Great stories and happy outcomes! Then I also watched "Cats 101." But the whole time I have been on Cafemom. I did spend a little time on Facebook, but not nearly the time I have usually spent lately. There's more for me to do on Cafemom.

Now I'm hungry again so as tired as I am, I think I'm going to take Jordan and get something else to eat and then I'll go to sleep. God only knows how long I'll sleep this time.

Oh, there was one other piece of news. Greg was going to fix my brakes. Told me to call him in the morning. Well, guess who I haven't heard from at all and haven't been able to reach. Anyway, I'm done. I don't want to deal with him anymore. He can stay with Linda the girl that treats him like crap and leave me alone. Not that I'm with him like that, but he talks shit about me to her. Talks shit about her to me. I am just tired of games. And I don't want to be in the middle. The woman had the nerve to text me last night and then forwarded what Greg texted her. Anyway, I don't want to be in the middle of their crap. I just wanted to get my brakes fixed like he said he'd done. But whatever. I'll see if Claudio will give me a break on the price. At least I hope.

Okay that's it. Enough. Nite.