Day 39 - Tired and Aggravated

Today has been a bitch of a day. Not really bad to start with. I didn't wake up until noon and that was after Jason called me like three times in a row. Ugh! I couldn't go back to sleep after that - not that I should have slept later than that anyway, but still . . . Then Cassie called me around 1:00pm to pick her up from school because she wasn't feeling well. Then Cassie stayed with me for a bit. She ate some of my mom's fresh split pea soup but burnt her tongue. She survived. Then she made her bed quickly once Jason and Susan came to pick her up.

Things just got worse from there. I mean, I had fun making a Facebook for Karissa. But when Jason called me and told me that Cassie was spending the night I wasn't happy. He pulled all kinds of shit on me. Telling me I was a 40-year old woman afraid of my mom - like he even knows what I go through. He's an asshole. He really is sometimes to the point where I don't even want to hear from him. And of course, I found out that he talks shit behind my back. This is why, as much as I love him and appreciate what he'd done for Cassie and I, I don't trust him emotionally. He's way too volitale.

Then as if that wasn't bad enough I find out that Rena's going to be taken back. I knew someone had to have said something to make them say it wasn't working out and that they were going to pick her up. When I said that to Jason, he flipped out at me AGAIN!! I found out later than Susan had told them about the cats. Duh?? You don't do that. At least that's what Cassie said. And then Cassie was upset by that, and by Jason yelling at her. By him and Susan fighting. She was so upset she was thinking about coming back home. And again, she told me I'm the only one she trusts and that she has been thinking about coming home because of the constant yelling and such. I just hate the fact that Jason can act like a two year old and get everyone upset and he thinks "I'm Sorry" makes everything better. This has always been an issue for me.

And it's not like we're fighting right now or anything, but I am still not happy with him right now. Of course, I'm tired. My chest hurts. I feel like emotionally I've been on edge all day and it's just grown worse trying to deal with his ass.

Anyway, I'm tired. I'm going to take my pills and go to sleep. I've had enough of today and of Jason . . .